Uncle Leona's Day Camp

It's too damn hot to be clever

I was trying to come up with some catchy title to preface this entry, but when one is dealing with the 10th day over 90 in the month of June (and the first where I actually played golf...don't come too close; I think the deodorant is fading fast), one's grasp of the English language tends to loosen. Day 11 is scheduled for Thursday, then a cold front is supposed to come through, Hell will break loose, and the weekend will be cooler.

I'll believe it when I see it. So will my lawn.

I did get out to Fiberfest at Lake Farmpark last weekend. It was small, but nice. Of course, I couldn't leave without a little booty:

This is some blue faced leicester for a sweater:

It's sooooo soft to the touch. The sweater will ultimately be gorgeous. I'm thinking of using this stuff I already spun in some capacity on that sweater:

This is some stuff that's basically off the cutting room floor: a little wool, mohair, angora, alpaca, and I'm guessing some dog since the guy who sold it to me wanted to give me a ball of dog roving for free. I passed on the Fido fiber; doggies make me wheeze and break out in hives. Trust me, it's not pretty. Anyhow, the stuff spun up in no time flat, and the resultant yarn is subtle and soft. A yoke, perhaps??? We'll see.

As for ongoing projects, I'm now on the Rabbit Lace portion of the Spirit of the Southwest shawl:

The latest two patterns are Corn Lace and River Lace. Very pretty, but I'm glad they're done. Too many screwups by me requiring ripping, reknitting, and a curse word or two. Or ten. After the Rabbit Lace is one more pattern, then it's time to add the border. I may have it finished before I head up to Canada at the end of July. Personally, I'm hoping to get to work on the border sometime this weekend as I sit around hoping the bottle rockets don't hit the kindling also known as my front lawn.

Why some people shouldn't drink

Now, I have seen stupid drunks numerous times over my legal age lifetime. Hell, I hit one of them in a bar (long story short, he kissed me after I told his gross, sorry ass not to; he lost the fight). Last night, however, I was lucky enough to be addressed by one of the dopiest drunks ever.

Set the scene: I'm in the restaurant area of a local brew pub hanging out with dear friends, John and Wendy, up here from Atlanta, and my buddy, Don. This is the first opportunity I've had to meet their 5-month-old baby, Andrew. Wendy took Andrew to the bathroom to change his diaper. As John, Don and I are enjoying each other's company, some big-haired woman with summer teeth (summer here, summer not...) dressed in something akin to a muu muu came up to our table, looked at me and Don, and remarked,

"Have fun with your grandson!"

Mind you, I'm 43 (and I don't look a day over 35, thank you very much), Don's 45, and my friends are in their 30's. Anyone out there could figure out I'm not a parent of a thirty-something. Anyone but this ding-dong.

Apparently, Wendy was chatting with this numbnut in the bathroom. When she said she and John were "staying with his parents and coming out to visit friends," the woman heard, "the baby is visiting his grandparents."

She also could have heard, "Please, act like a fool in front of my husband and friends. We could use someone to laugh at." In that, she succeeded.

Now, please pass the Geritol. I think I'm going to have a Metamucil chaser.

A little of this, a little of that

After a quick scan of the last few blog entries, I realized that I've been a bit remiss on updating the knitting content. What can I say? Yard work and bunny repelling have taken over my life.

Quick little PSA: that bunny stuff works. My flower bed is much happier.

Anywho, I did felt the Booga Bag a while ago. It's now housing my shawl in progress:

The colors in the photo are spot on: I love this particular Kureyon.

And here is said shawl in progress:

I'm plodding away on the "Corn Lace" portion. It's taking forever. The Helen's Lace is still great stuff to work with. That 50% silk content adds just the right touch of sheen to the yarn.

Of course, Kato is just pissed that she can't sit near me as I knit this thing:

I have also scoured eBay and scored a couple of lots of lace weight stuff. It's so dangerous to have a balance in your PayPal account.

The purple stuff is wool from sanfelipeysantiago, who has a ton of laceweight stuff out there. The white is alpaca from sheila1wallpaper. Both are quite sweet. And quite cheap. Of course, I have no idea what I'm doing with it.

Good to know some things never change.

Hey, has anyone out there gone to Fiberfest at Lake FarmPark in the past? It's next weekend, and I'm trying to decide if I need to make the road trip.

With all due respects to Bugs, Peter, and the Easter Bunny

Remember my planting extravaganza from a couple of weeks ago? Well, it seems as though one of the local bunnies has decided to use my flower bed as a personal salad bar. It's probably a bunny I spared from my lawn mower earlier this spring, too.

Ungrateful bastard.

Anyhow, I headed off to my local garden store to look for rabbit repellant. The guy there pointed out two products: one which contained the active ingredients of putrified egg solids and garlic, the other with the added touch of capsaicin (aka pepper spray). I opted for the latter; figured it would take care of the rabbit properly even if he had some adenoidal problem. We'll see what happens. Personally, I'd love to see that little punk bite into the flowers and start panting.

The best thing about the search for critter repellants was to see the other stuff out there. The most interesting to me was bobcat urine. Let me remind you: I live in Northeast Ohio. The closest thing we get to bobcats are stray tomcats that impregnate all the local whore cats. I'm not sure any of our regional critters would know bobcat urine if they smelled it.

"Hmmm....Chip, what do you think that smell is?"
"I don't know, Dale. Smells eerily similar to Fluffy, but with a gamey finish."

I know. I'm odd.

No, I haven't melted in the heat

I just managed to catch a small touch of the plague from one of the rugrats at work. I'm presently much better, but for the last two days, I've been battling my asthma pretty fiercely. I'm hoping to untie myself from the nebulizer today and just use my inhaler. Here's hoping this goes away soon; I'm tired of purring.

To add to my frustration, the pool guys have yet to show up to open up my cement pond. They were supposed to be here on Thursday; it's now Saturday, and the pool cover is still firmly in position. Yeah, I probably could do this myself, but it's just too much of a pain. Especially in 90 degree air you can cut with a knife.

Did I ever mention how much I love eBay? Here's the latest reason:

Thanks to sales of a putter (at a profit), cotton roving I couldn't figure out how to spin (at a profit), and some Rowan All Seasons Cotton, I had enough $$$ in the PayPal account to score a Delphi MyFi Satellite Radio. This thing is so cool I almost don't need air conditioning. There's over 100 channels of music (subtract the country and rap stations; they won't get listened to) and Major League Baseball I can listen to anywhere. Now I REALLY need the pool to get opened up so I can veg out in the float and jam.

Oh, and Wendy? You are the enabler of all time. I was sucked in by her Summer of Lace knitalong along with many of her minions. Not only is the Papiro halfway home,

but I started up a shawl that's been languishing in the stash for a while. I had a skein of Lorna's Laces Helen's Lace, so here we go:

It hasn't been a bad one to do, but I have had occasion to rip out a row or two about three times due to screwing up the yo in the middle of the thing. The design is very cute, too. So far, you're looking at Sunshine Lace and Butterfly Lace. Next is some zigzaggy pattern, but I need to go out and get me a bigger size 6 Addi Turbo.

Darn, a LYS trip.

Right after I call the pool guys and bitch.

I think Hawaii has it figured out

One month ago, it was snowing here in beautiful downtown Westlake, Ohio. OK, maybe I'm off a day or so; forgive me, I'm old. Anyhow, I just put down the last of 10 bags of mulch today (5 yesterday/5 today; it's all about balance) in 90 degree heat. Breeze? We don't need no stinkin' breeze! And clouds? Ha! Here's a clue as to how comfy it was out there:

Yes, that's a salt line on the brim below the sweat line (I've been know to drip off of a brim in the past). Suffice it to say, I'm not an attractive sweaty person.

You'd think that living one mile from Lake Erie would afford me a tradewind or two. At least the mulch didn't fly around. And I must say the new flowers are looking quite lovely. Just have to remember not to water them with the liquid that first comes out of my hose. You can boil eggs with that stuff.

Yes, I'm bitching. It's part of living in this town. If you can't complain about the weather, the politics, or the sports teams, you really shouldn't live in the Greater Cleveland area. It's in our DNA.

The storage unit continues to stand proudly in the sewing room. I have yet to attack the fabric area. Too busy with golf and yard work--the knee has been just a tad stiff (it's bitching; remember, the knee grew up here, too). Makes sitting on the ground and getting up a bit interesting. Maybe I should get me one of those LifeAlert necklaces.

Not much to post on the knitting front. The Papiro pullover is plugging along; the back is almost done. I did finish up a Booga Bag last night (the majority of it was knit in the back of my Dad's Explorer on the way to Ikea. Here's the "before" shot:

Maybe I'll felt it this afternoon after I take my shower. Maybe I'll just throw myself in the washer, too.